A Week In a Country Jail

One time I spent a week inside this little country jail
And I don't guess I'll ever live it down
I was sittin' at a red light when these two men came and got me
And they said that I was speeding through their town

They said tomorrow morning you can see the judge then go
They let me call one person on the phone
I thought I'd be there overnight so I just called the boss
To tell him I'd be off but not for long

They motioned me inside a cell with seven other guys
One little barred-up window in the rear
My cellmate said if they had let me bring some money in
We oughta send the jailer for some beer

We had to pay him double 'cause he was the man in charge
And a jailer's job was not the best in town
Later on his wife brought hot baloney, eggs and gravy
The first day that I was there I turned it down

Next morning they just let us sleep, but I was up real early
Wondering if I'd get my release
Later on we got more hot baloney, eggs and gravy
By now I wasn't quite so hard to please

Two days later when I thought that I'd been forgot
The sheriff came in a-chewin' on a straw
He said, "Where's that guy who thinks that this is Indianapolis?
I'd like to talk to him about the law"

I told him who I was and told him I was working steady
And I really should be getting on my way
The part about me being who I was did not impress him
And he said the judge would be there any day

The jailer had a wife and let me tell you she was awful
But she brought that hot baloney every day
And after seven days she got to looking so much better
I asked her if she'd like to run away

Next morning that old judge took every nickel that I had
And said, "Son, let that teach you not to race"
The jailer's wife was smiling from the window as I left
In thirty minutes I was out of state