Comedy Tonight

Something familiar,
Something peculiar,
Something for everyone:
A comedy tonight!
Something appealing,
Something appalling,
Something for everyone:
A comedy tonight!
Nothing with kings, nothing with crowns;
Bring on the lovers, liars and clowns!
Old situations,
New complications,
Nothing portentous or polite;
Tragedy tomorrow,
Comedy tonight!
Something convulsive,
Something repulsive,
Something for everyone:
A comedy tonight!
Something aesthetic,
Something frenetic,
Something for everyone:
A comedy tonight!

Nothing with gods
Nothing with fate
Weighty affairs will just have to wait
Nothing that's formal
Nothing that's normal
No recitations to recite
Open up the curtain
Comedy tonight!

Something erratic
Something dramatic
Something for everyone
A comedy tonight!
Frenzy and frolic
Strictly symbolic
Something for everyone
A comedy tonight!

Now, the entire company!

Something familiar
Something peculiar
Something for everybody
Comedy tonight!
Something that's gawdy
Something that's bawdy
Something for everybody
Comedy tonight!

Nothing that's grim
Nothing that's Greek
She plays Medea later this week
Stunning surprises
Cunning disguises
Hundreds of actors out of sight
Pantaloons and tunics
Courtesans and eunuchs
Funerals and chases
Baritones and basses
Panderers
Philanderers
Cupidity
Timidity
Mistakes
Fakes
Rhymes
Mimes
Tumblers, grumblers, bumblers, fumblers
No royal curse
No Trojan horse
And a happy ending, of course!

Goodness and badness
Man in his madness
This time it all turns out all right

Tragedy tomorrow
Comedy tonight!

One, two, three!