Lyrics Hide - Gray Fox feat. Angela Lorenzana

I saw something in the way that you looked at me
Figuring how to hide the pieces after dissecting me
Dreaming how to live your life without the leech that kept you in
Looking for your lover and wondering where the fuck he went
I'm wondering where the fuck I went
A body too heavy to fly with the wind
The soul was left trying to fend for itself; ethereal and untouchable
A ghost in the shell
Closer to hell with every dragging second of this manmade concept
Still don't get why I'm not gone yet
Guess I didn't swallow enough of that Razarem
Funny how I told myself that I was making progress
All this just to find that it was only temporary
A paperback cover that banded my obituary
Confined and solitary even in your presence
Draining your essence with the burden of my suppression
The succubus of my depression - it feeds off my aggression
Makes love with the obsession
Constantly scribing questions on the stone of your grave and convincing you
That all of it's a product of your brain
But the tragedy, I see it
If you don't believe it, it will find its way behind your eyes and show you what it's seeking
Creeping in to rape your mind and leave you barely breathing
Wishing you were fucking dead to forget all the bleeding
But how do you make anybody feel what they're not grieving?
Destined to the feel the impalement created by your own iron maiden constructed
With the marrow of the bones they confiscated, fractured and lacerated
So I stared the devil right in his visage as we waltzed to the aria that he envisioned
Disharmony is beautiful if you could really listen, but God is still missing
I'll never be forgiven
Blasphemy
I'm eternally damned for the slip of a Judas kiss, slaughtering the lamb
Took a taste of the mana before reaching the Promised Land
But it was sour so I settled for the sand
Holding my hands
Palm full of filaments
Honestly, I'm only walking due to the ambivalence
Too scared to discover what lies within the permanence
Praying that my skeleton simply becomes an ornament buried in an orifice seventy-two inches
Layered with a blanket of hydrangeas and scabias
Let the colors deliquesce, vines become the stitches, blooming back upon the earth
Shedding my sapience so I can dance away in a light breeze surrounded by others that are like me
I'm barely holding onto what might be
I'm still struggling to fight and do the right thing
How long does it take for me to waste?
I don't deserve love
I don't deserve grace
I don't deserve her
I can't reserve space for something that could never be replaced
Sometimes I really wish I had the spine to drive my Pontiac into a cliffside
'Cause I'm an insomniac searching for eternal bedtime like cardiacs invested in a flatline
I don't want to be disturbed, I just want to be heard and learn that there is something better
Exhausted
Skin still rotting like a leper
Yearning for a quenching
Wandering through this desert
Praying that a zephyr will ever come of this effort
Gotta save the mangled bits and hope they never sever
No one feels what I feel
No one loves how I love
This probably is not enough
I'm sorry that I'm fucked up

I know it's not enough but I'm sorry that I'm fucked up

I guess I'll try to get some sleep and hope I wake up to the warmth of your heartbeat
I guess I'll try to get some sleep and hope I wake up and I'm finally free

I hide myself away so no one else can see the part inside of me that I don't want to be