Farley

The first time I saw him
He was sweeter than shit
Plaid jacket and belt too tight
He wasn't even doing a bit

Then he cartwheeled around the room
And slow danced with the cleaning lady
He was a one man party

You know who I'm talking about
I'm talking about my friend Chris Farley

On a Saturday night my man
Would always deliver
Whether he was the bumblebee girl
Or living in a van down by the river

He loved the Bears and did the dance
At Chippendales with Swayze
When they replaced his coffee with Folgers
He went fuckin' crazy

The sexiest gap girl
And Meatloaf in the band
Without him there'd be no lunch lady
In lunch lady land

Oh, you know who I'm thinking about
I'm thinking about my boy
Chris Farley

After a show he'd drink a quarter Jack Daniels
And stick the bottle right up his ass
But, hangover as hell
That catholic boy
Always show up to morning mass

We tell him "Slow down, you'll end up like Belushi and Candy"
He said "Those guys are my heroes, that's all fine and dandy"

I ain't making that shit up
That's the truth about my boy
Chris Farley

I saw him in the office crying with his headphones on
Listening to a KC And The Sunshine Band song

I said "Buddy, how the hell is that making you so sad"
Then he laughed and said "Just thinkin' about my dad"

The last big hang we had was at Timmy Meadows's wedding party
We laughed our balls off all nightlong, all because of Farley

But a few months later
The party came to an end
We flew out to Madison
To bury our friend

Nothing was harder
Than saying goodbye
Except watching Chris's father
Have his turn to cry

Hey buddy, life's moved on
But you still bring us so much joy
Make my kids laugh with your
Youtube clips or Tommy Boy

And when they ask me
Who's the funniest guy I ever knew
I tell them hands down
Without a doubt it's you

Yeah, I miss hanging out
Watching you trying to get laid
But most of all I miss
Watching you fuck with Spade

Well, it ended like you wanted
But I wish you were still here with me
And we would get on a plain
To go shoot Grown Ups 3

Yeah, life ain't the same without you boy

And that's why I'm singing about
I'm singing about my friend Chris Farley

And if you make enough noise
Maybe he'll hear us

Give it up for the great
Chris Farley