Текст песни The Kids - Eminem
And
everyone
should
get
along
Okay
children,
quiet
down,
quiet
down
Children,
I′d
like
to
introduce
our
new
substitute
teacher
for
the
day
His
name
is
Mr.
Shady
Chidren,
quiet
down
please
Brian,
don't
throw
that
(shut
up)
Mr.
Shady
will
be
your
new
substitute
while
Mr.
Kaniff
is
out
with
Pneumonia
(he′s
got
AIDS)
Good
luck
Mr.
Shady
Hi
there,
little
boys
and
girls
(fuck
you)
Today
we're
going
to
learn
how
to
poison
squirrels
But
first
I'd
like
you
to
meet
my
friend
Bob
(huh?)
Say
hi,
Bob
(Hi
Bob)
Bob′s
thirty
and
still
lives
with
his
mom
He
don′t
got
a
job
cause
Bob
sits
at
home
and
smokes
pot
But
his
twelve
year
old
brother
looks
up
to
him
an
awful
lot
And
Bob
likes
to
hang
out
at
the
local
waffle
spot
And
wait
in
the
parking
lot
for
waitresses
off
the
clock
When
it's
late
and
the
lot
gets
dark
and
fake
like
he
walks
his
dog
Drag
′em
in
the
woods
and
go
straight
to
the
chopping
block
(Ah)
And
even
if
they
escaped
and
they
got
the
cops
The
ladies
would
all
be
so
afraid
they
would
drop
the
charge
Til
one
night
Mrs.
Stacey
went
off
the
job
When
she
felt
someone
grab
hold
her
whole
face
and
said
not
to
talk
But
Stacey
knew
it
was
Bob
and
said
"Knock
it
off"
But
Bob
wouldn't
knock
it
off,
cause
he′s
crazy
and
off
his
rocker
Crazier
than
Slim
Shady
is
off
the
vodka
You
couldn't
even
take
him
to
Dre′s
to
get
Bob
a
doctor
He
grabbed
Stace'
by
the
legs
as
he
chopped
it
off
her
And
dropped
her
off
in
the
lake
for
the
cops
to
find
her
But
ever
since
the
day
Stacey
went
off
to
wander
They
never
found
her,
and
Bob
still
hangs
at
the
waffle
diner
And
that's
the
story
of
Bob
and
his
marijuana
And
what
it
might
do
to
you
So
see
if
the
squirrels
want
any,
it′s
bad
for
you
See,
children,
drugs
are
bad
(come
on)
And
if
you
don′t
believe
me,
ask
your
dad
(raise
your
hand)
And
if
you
don't
believe
him,
ask
your
mom
(that′s
right)
She'll
tell
you
how
she
does
′em
all
the
time
(she
will)
So
kids
say
no
to
drugs
(that's
right)
So
you
don′t
act
like
everyone
else
does
(uh
huh)
Then
there's
really
nothin'
else
to
say
(sing
along)
Drugs
are
just
bad,
m′kay?
My
penis
is
the
size
of
a
peanut,
have
you
seen
it?
Fuck
no
you
aint
seen
it,
it′s
the
size
of
a
peanut
(Huh?)
Speakin'
of
peanuts,
you
know
what
else
is
bad
for
squirrels?
Ectasy,
it′s
the
worst
drug
in
the
world
If
someone
ever
offers
it
to
you,
don't
do
it
Kids,
two
hits′ll
probably
drain
all
your
spinal
fluid
And
spinal
fluid
is
final,
you
won't
get
it
back
So
don′t
get
attatched,
it'll
attack
every
bone
in
your
back
Meet
Zach,
twenty
one
years
old
After
hanging
out
with
some
friends
at
a
frat
party,
he
gets
bold
And
decides
to
try
five
when
he's
bribed
by
five
guys
And
peer
pressure
will
win
every
time
you
try
to
fight
it
Suddenly,
he
starts
to
convulse
And
his
pulse
goes
into
hyperdrive
And
his
eyes
roll
back
in
his
skull
(blblblblblb)
His
back
starts
to,
look
like
the
McDonalds
arches
He′s
on
Donald′s
carpet,
layin'
horizontal
barfin′
(Bleh)
And
everyone
in
the
apartment
starts
laughin'
at
him
"Hey
Adam,
Zach
is
a
jackass,
look
at
him!"
Cause
they
took
it
too,
so
they
think
it′s
funny
So
they're
laughing
at
basically
nothing
Except
maybe
wasting
their
money
Meanwhile,
Zach′s
in
a
coma,
the
action
is
over
And
his
back
and
his
shoulders
hunched
up
like
he's
practicing
yoga
And
that's
the
story
of
Zach
"The
Ecstasy
maniac"
So,
don′t
even
feed
that
to
squirrels,
class,
cause
it′s
bad
for
you
See,
children,
drugs
are
bad
(that's
right)
And
if
you
don′t
believe
me,
ask
your
dad
(that's
right)
And
if
you
don′t
believe
him,
ask
your
mom
(you
can)
She'll
tell
you
how
she
does
′em
all
the
time
(she
will)
So
kids
say
no
to
drugs
(smoke
crack)
So
you
don't
act
like
everyone
else
does
(that's
right)
And
there′s
really
nothing
else
to
say
(But
umm...)
Drugs
are
just
bad,
m′kay?
And
last
but
not
least
One
of
the
most
humongous
Problems
among
young
people
today
is
fungus
It
grows
from
cow
manure
They
pick
it
out,
wipe
if
off,
bag
it
up
And
you
put
it
right
in
your
mouth
and
chew
it
Yum,
yum
And
then
you
start
to
see
some
dumb
stuff
And
everything
slows
down
when
you
eat
some
of
'em
And
sometimes
you
see
things
that
aren′t
there
(like
what?)
Like
fat
women
in
G-strings
with
orange
hair
(Mr.
Shady,
what's
a
g-string?)
It′s
yarn,
Claire
Women
stick
them
up
their
behinds
go
out
and
wear
'em
(Hu?)
And
if
you
swallow
too
much
of
the
magic
mushrooms
Whoops,
did
I
say
magic
mushrooms?
I
meant
fungus
Your
tongue
gets
all
swoll
up
like
a
cow′s
tongue
(How
come?)
Cause
it
comes
from
a
cow's
dump
(Gross!)
See,
drugs
are
bad,
it's
a
common
fact
But
your
mom
and
dad
know
that′s
all
that
I′m
good
at
(Oh!)
But
don't
be
me,
cause
if
you
grow
up
and
go
and
OD
They′re
gonna
come
for
me,
and
I'm
gonna
have
to
grow
a
goatee
And
get
a
disguise
and
hide,
cause
it′ll
be
my
fault
So
don't
drugs
and
do
exactly
as
I
don′t,
cause
I'm
bad
for
you
See,
children,
drugs
are
bad
(uh
huh)
And
if
you
don't
believe
me,
ask
your
dad
(put
that
down)
And
if
you
don′t
believe
him,
ask
your
mom
(you
can
ask)
She′ll
tell
you
how
she
does
'em
all
the
time
(and
she
will)
So
kids
say
no
to
drugs
(say
no)
So
you
don′t
act
like
everyone
else
does
(like
I
do)
And
there's
really
nothing
else
to
say
(that′s
right)
Drugs
are
just
bad,
m'kay?
Come
on
children,
clap
along
(Shut
up!)
Sing
along,
children,
(Suck
my
motherfuckin
dick!)
come
on,
clap
along
Drugs
are
just
bad,
drugs
are
just
bad
(South
Park
is
gonna
sue
me!)
So
don′t
do
drugs
(Suck
my
motherfuckin'
ass!)
So
there'll
be
more
for
me
(Hippie!
God
damnit!)
(Mushrooms
killed
Kenny!...Ewww,
ahhh!)
(So,
fucked
up,
right
now)
1 Marshall Mathers
2 Steve Berman
3 The Way I Am
4 Paul (Skit)
5 Kill You
6 I'm Back
7 Kim
8 The Kids
9 Under the Influence
10 Public Service Announcement 2000
11 Ken Kaniff (skit)
12 Criminal
13 Bitch Please II
14 Drug Ballad
15 Who Knew
16 Remember Me?
17 Amityville
18 Amityville
19 Under the Influence
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