Текст песни Universal Credit - Shambolics

Sit down
Mr. Forbes, I'm Mr. Mcdonald
And I'll be your advisor for the foreseeable future
I've noticed you've been with us now for quite some time
But still haven't found yourself a job
What exactly is your reason for this?
Just can't be arsed man

You'll never make it in this game
Cut your hair and change your name
Go and find yourself a job
Your band is never taking off

But, sir, just give us another chance
I can do with an advance
Crisis loan will sign me up
I just need a little luck

Mr. Forbes, it's not an offer
I know this working life is tough
Do you seem to find some joy?
Being in debt and unemployed

Nah, this working ain't for me
I'm gonna sit in my seat
Strumming on this old guitar
Tell 'em higher than the stars!

I don't need no money
I wanna be happier than you
I don't need no money
I wanna be happier than you

So, Mr. Forbes, it's been 6 years
I'd like to know why you're still here
Let me find a job for you
What's it that you'd like to do?

I'd like to keep on playing my tunes
I feel it's gonna blow up soon
Check my band on Instagram
People chantin', "Mon the Shams!"

I think it's time to sanction you
You need to face some long, hard truths
Never seem to look for work
You're only riding on your luck

Fine I'll take it on the chin
I'll play the long game and I'll win
Fuck you and your silly job
I'm gonna make it to the top

I don't need no money
I wanna be happier than you
I don't need no money
I wanna be happier than you

You'll think I'll never get
Universal Credit?
Tells me that I'll never be the one
You'll think I'll never get
Universal Credit?
Tells me I'll never be the one

So, Mr. Forbes
What I've gathered is
You don't actually want a job
But you still want us to be paying for something
That's none other than a silly paid dream

Who do you think you are?
Think you're a high life roller? (What!)
You're nothing but a low-life doler (my God, man)
How can you sit there, keeping your composure?
Especially when you're a daft weed stoner! (Who the fuck are you talking to?)
Kicking about in your shitty wee motor
You're gonna spend all your days a loner
That's it, I've had enough, appointment over!

I don't need no money
I wanna be happier than you
I don't need no money
I wanna be happier than you

I don't need your money
I gonna be happier than you
I don't need your money
I'm gonna be happier than you

I've had enough, man, get out of my fucking sight