Текст песни Morning Wood - TurtleFrogMan
I'm nearly 90 years old and confined to this chair
I miss my racy convertible and the wind in my hair
I miss my manly physique, my unwrinkled complexion
But more than any of these, I miss my morning erection
I'm so old, I suppose that it should go without mention
That over time, all soldiers will cease to stand at attention
Every infantry man must retire his flute
And I will never again see his one eyed salute
Morning Wood, Morning Wood
For long have you stood
A mighty oak rising from the underwear plains
Morning wood, morning wood
You've been chopped down for good
And a crooked old stick
Is all that remains
There's no way to discuss this in a manner that's civil
When your prostate enlarges, your penis will shrivel
When you're young you're so hard that a cat couldn't scratch it
But a cancerous prostate hits your wood like a hatchet
All erections are precious, but morning wood even more so
It rises like a battering ram from your torso
If morning wood were a shovel, you could dig straight to china
And it will penetrate even the shyest vagina
Morning Wood, Morning Wood
For long have you stood
A mighty oak rising from the underwear plains
Morning wood, morning wood
You've been chopped down for good
And a withered old pinecone
Is all that remains
Frank Sinatra was buried with a full flask of Jack
A dollar's worth of dimes and a cigarette pack
I've made all my arrangements from the viewing to the florist
It will look just like I'm sleeping beneath a tree in a forest
And when I've surrendered to eternity's slumber
You'll be amazed what they can do now with a small piece of lumber
When you come to my casket to pay your final respect
You'll be shocked when you notice that I'm fully erect!
Morning Wood, Morning Wood
For long have you stood
A mighty oak rising from the underwear plains
Morning wood, morning wood
You've been chopped down for good
And a small piece of lumber
Screwed into my thighs bones
And carefully balanced
Is all that remains
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