Lyrics The Baseball Game - 'Falsettos' 2016 Broadway Company

We're sitting
And watching Jason play baseball
We're watching Jason play baseball
We're watching Jewish boys,
Who cannot play baseball, play baseball!
We're watching Jewish boys,
Who cannot play baseball play-

I hate baseball, I really do!
Unlike the rest of you,
I hate baseball!

CORDELIA & CHARLOTTE:

We really wish he'd take this more seriously!

It's weird how he swings the bat!

It's weird how he swings the bat.
And why does he have to throw like that?

We're sitting
And watching Jason make errors,
The most pathetical errors!
We're watching Jewish boys,
Who almost read Latin,
Up, battin',
And battin' bad!

Remember Sandy Koufax!
You can do it if you wanna do it!
Take heart from Hank Greenberg!
It's not genetic,
Even you can be copasetic!
I think, I think,
I think you can, I think you can!

We're sitting
And watching Jason play baseball,
We're watching Jason play baseball!
We're watching Jewish boys,
We're watching Jewish boys,
We're watching-
SLIDE, JASON!
Slide, Jason!
Slide

What's he doing here?

What are you doing here?

Jason asked me to come. Since he asked me to come, I came.

Just what I wanted at a Little League game.
My ex-husband's ex-lover!
Isn't that what every mother dreams about
Having at a Little League game?

Looking at Whizzer is like eating treyf.

The kid was out!

The kid was safe!

The kid was out!

The kid was safe!

Hey!
I love baseball,
I love Jason
That's what I'm doing here.

CHARLOTTE: (spoken)

Hey! Where the hell'd they get that umpire?!
Sorry.
Sorry!

MARVIN: (sung)

Look who's here. Say hello.

Hello.

MARVIN: And you're looking sweeter than a donut.

Marvin.

Whizzer.

Is he still queer?

Am I queer?

I don't know!

Does it matter?

It's been so long since I could tell.
Sit in front of me,
I wanna see the bald spot!
C'mon, c'mon!
Sit in front of me,
It gives me pleasure to see the bald spot!
Since it's the only
Physical imperfection that you've got.
I wanna see it!
I wanna touch it!
I wanna run my hands through it!

We're sitting
And watch the kid as he misses!
We're watching Marvin throw kisses,
We're watching sixty-seven pounders,
Watching Jewish boys in scroungers,
Watching boys feel, boys bat,
Boys miss, boys at-
Watching Jason on deck,
Swinging the bat!

WHIZZER: (spoken)

Hey, Jason!

Oh, hi Whizzer!
Glad you came

WHIZZER: (sung)

Keep your head in the box.
Don't think of a thing,
Keep your head in the box,
Your eye on the ball,
Take a breath, then let it out
And swing!

Keep your head in the box.
(Keep your head in the box)
Don't think of a thing,
(Don't think of a thing)
Keep your head in the box,
(Keep you head in the box)
Your eye on the ball,
(Your eye on the ball)
Take a breath, then let it out
And swing!

(Spoken) Okay, go get 'em

JASON (spoken):

Thanks Whizzer Even bald, he looks good.
Even bald, he looks good.

Just remember he's an psychotic

He looks damn good, but he's cheap as dirt.

Even maniacs can charm,
Which he does, so beware.

And just be careful.

When he smiles that smile, avoid him,
Or else sound the alert!

Whizzer

Marvin.

Do you think there's any hope for the kid?

I love Jason but,
This is not his venue

MARVIN & WHIZZER:

How could I know?
(Without him)
My life would be boring as shit.

WHIZZER: (spoken)

Jason! You gotta move a little closer to the plate!

MARVIN: (sung)

Oh, yes, it is-
(Spoken) What' He's gonna be hit by the ball!

MARVIN & WHIZZER: (sung)

Please, God, don't let me make the same mistake!

We're sitting
And watching Jason, the batter!
We know our cheering won't matter!
It is the very final inning
And the other team is winning,
And there's two outs, two strikes,
But the bases are loaded and-

Could it be possible to see you, or to kiss you,
Or to give you a call?

Anything's possible, Jason
Hit
The ball!

Run!