Lyrics I'm Calm - Jack Gilford

Calm, yes, calm
Mustn't get excited
Calm, calm

I'm calm, I'm calm
I'm perfectly calm
I'm utterly under control
I haven't a worry
Where others would hurry, I stroll

I'm calm, I'm cool
A gibbering fool is one thing I never become
When thunder is rumbling
And others are crumbling, I hum

I must think calm comforting things
Butterfly wings, emerald rings
Or a murmuring brook
Murmuring, murmuring, murmuring, look

I'm calm, I'm calm
I haven't a qualm
I'm utterly under control
Let nothing confuse me or faze me
Excuse me

I'm calm
Oh, so calm
Oh, so
(Hysterium!)

I'm calm, I'm calm
I'm perfectly calm
Indifferent to tensions and shocks
Unruffled and ready
My nerves are as steady as rocks

I'm calm, controlled
So cool that I'm cold
Aloofer than any giraffe
When something's the matter
Where others would shatter, I laugh

I must breathe deep, ever so deep
Think about sheep
Going to sleep
Stop and count up to ten
One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine

When you need aplomb
And want to be calm
'Cause life is a horrible dream
Just count up to ten
Very slowly, and then
One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine
(Hysterium!)
Scream