Lyrics Bangers And Mash - Peter Sellers

Him: I met 'er down in Napoli and didn't she look great
And so I brought 'er back to Blighty just to show me mates
And though we're married 'appily, I'll tell ya furthermore
I 'aven't 'ad a decent meal since Nineteen-Forty-Four!

Her: Eat your minestrone, Joe!
Him: That's all you ever say!
Her: Eat your macaroni, Joe!
Him: Ev'ry blinkin' day!
Her: No wonder you're so boney, Joe

And skinny as a rake!

Him: Well then, give us a bash at the bangers and mash me muvver used to make!

Him: Bangers and mash

Her: Minestrone
Him: Bangers and mash

Her: Macaroni
Him: Give us a bash at the bangers and mash me muvver used to make!

Her: Eat your tagliatelli, Joe!
Him: That's all I've 'eard for years!
Her: Eat your vermicelli, Joe!
Him: It's comin' out me ears!
Her: You've got to fill your belly, Joe! Joe, for heaven's sake!
Him: Well then, give us a bash at the bangers and mash me muvver used to make! Her: Well, alright!
Him: Bangers and mash
Her: Tagliatelli
Him: Bangers and mash
Her: Vermicelli
Him: Ah, give us a bash at the bangers and mash me muvver used to make!
(Spoken. All voices by Sellers):
American reporter: Nineteen-Forty-Three, Allied Forces land in Italy!
1st soldier: There's a smashin'-lookin' bird over there, Bert. I think she's showin' out there.
2nd soldier: Well, why don't you chat 'er up then?

1st soldier: Right! Bongourno Signorina now. 'Ere, are you married?
Italian Girl: Drop dead
1st soldier: There y'are. Can't 'ave a fairer answer than that, can ya!

Her: I met him back in Italy, so dashing and good-looking
He wined me and he dined me ev'ry night
He said I smiled so prettily and how he loved my cooking
But since he's married me, it seems he's lost his appetite
Him (Italian accent): Eat your tagliatelli, Soph!
Her (Cockney accent): That's all you ever say! Ooohhhhh!
Him: Eat your vermicelli, Soph!
Her: Ev'ry bloomin' day!
Him: You've a-got to fill your belly, Soph! Soph, for heaven's sake!
Her: Well then, give us a bash at the bangers and mash your muvver used to make!
Him: Bangers and mash
Her: Minestrone
Him: Bangers and mash
Her: Macaroni
Give me a bash with the bangers and mash! Her:(Laughing)
Like the same one what your mother was! Her: (Laughing)
What you laughing at now? Her: (Laughing)
Him: (Indistinct). .... Please!
Joe? Yes
Why don't you belt up or I'll give you punch up the throat!
Now she's-a-tells-a-me. Hah! Mamma Mia!