Lyrics Samurai Dave - Songs to Wear Pants To

Yo, he collects dogs, and might dress them in kimonos
Drink sake at the bus stop like a hobo
Pick little phillip all the prettiest roses
Too much banana in your dog? nathan exploded
He's into furniture making and jujitsu
So find a stick of furniture and he might hit you
Or fill your house with some wolf spider babies
After he's finished dressing up like a lady
It's samurai dave!
The badass-est baddest samurai
Never to be an actual samurai
It's samurai dave!
He can fit through the nostril of the buddha, man
It's crazy, get a camera guy
But even samurais need a little break time
So they can snack on some ostrich and snake wine
He's a generous man as far as food goes
He'll even buy a sandwich for some colorful rogues
But no cucumber! and no watermelon!
Dave doesn't like them, and whatever else you're selling
He's just gonna order various pig parts
Oh so delicious pig lungs and pig hearts
A big lung problem beset him once in japan
He got flirted with by the girl nurses and a man who brought him manga
As they took his chest and just stabbed it
No anesthetic required, he's just a rabbit
So now he's got these crazy scars
But it's hard, you have to travel that far
If you wanna eat a bee larva,
Or drink sake-in-a-jar
After wandering the streets at 2am to find the perfect bar
Though if he's been there before, he can do it with ease
Drawn by the scents of ale, no lager please
But maybe curry with cheese, everything with cheese
It's in my teeth like teriyaki cricket knees
It's samurai dave!
The badass-est baddest samurai
Never to be an actual samurai
It's samurai dave!
He's a serious man with a serious dog
And he's got a sick battle cry
He likes swords, he plays with swords
He collects swords, he makes some swords
Swords out of wood, swords out of metal
Little bits of chair, maybe a bike pedal
Real swords! pool noodles, not daggers
Round 1, flash-stepper vs. corpse dragger
And i know where i'm a place my bet
Have you seen dave's ninja moves? he's like a war vet
He jumps really high, he was in a circus troupe
He can jump even better than he makes a lettuce soup
He can climb and swing, he's got talents
Leap over anything, just give him a challenge
It's samurai dave!
The badass-est baddest samurai
Never to be an actual samurai
It's samurai dave!
He can fit through the nostril of the buddha, man
It's crazy, get a camera guy
It's samurai dave!
The badass-est baddest samurai
Never to be an actual samurai
It's samurai dave!
He's a serious man with a serious dog
Or at least he can fantasize