Lyrics distress tolerance - handkerchief code

I know I'm sensitive
I know I'm unstable
I know she dumped me
I know I'm unable
To cope with pain
In a safe way
It's all knives or nothing
It's the booze in my backpack
All my life
I've been shy
I can't communicate an emotional need to save my life
But my life is strange
My life is pain
Crying, cutting, drinking my life down the drain
I know these behaviors will kill me
I know they will
But I want to give up
I have no luck at all
I'm a failure
A complete an utter lost cause
That's unhealthy to say I know
But it's how I feel all the time