Текст песни Bitten By A Goose in Schaumburg, Il - TurtleFrogMan

On his motel room floor, my friend Chuck let me crash
I had a bus ticket to Chicago and 200 in cash
This free place to stay was a generous gift
See, I had dropped out of college and my life was adrift

While Chuck was at work, the motel owner came pounding
He said "You haven't paid a dime in rent and I'm tired of hounding"
I said, "When Chuck returns from work, I will remind him to pay"
He said, "I calling the sheriff, I want my money today"

You can call me a deadbeat or whatever you'd like
But I gathered my belongings and I boarded my bike
And made haste to the bus station with the coppers en route
I never spoke to Chuck again, I hope they worked it all out

This is quite a long story, you should try to hang loose
Pour yourself a stiff drink to enjoy
I'm getting to the part where I was bit by a goose
In Schaumburg, Illinois

I had a friend up in Schaumburg who invited me to stay
Schaumburg is a suburb of Chicago by the way
So I took the bus to Chicago and left my troubles behind it
I had his and address and phone number so I'd figured I'd find it

I took the L train to Schaumburg and it was shocking to me
Nothing but farm land as far as my eyes could see
No taxi cabs or buses, no pay phones around
So I just starting walking down the first road I found

And this road let to a highway but which direction do I go
My only hope was to hitchhike and so with dread I did so
A guy in a pickup stopped, I showed the address I'd written
He said, "get in the back with my dog, don't worry he's never bitten"

He was a grown man but unarmed, afraid of abuse
At heart, just a scared mama's boy
He's getting to the part where he was bit by a goose
In Schaumburg, Illinois

And this man who picked me up finally found the address
I had feared this guy would murder me, I must confess
He let me out of his truck and I was practically giddy
He said, "I used a quarter tank of gas, how bout you give me a fiddy?"

My friend's apartment had a number like one zero three
I found 101 and 104 so where the hell could it be?
I looked for it doggedly but it could not be found
I asked several people I saw milling around

But no one could help me solve this new mystery
Where in god's name was apartment 1 zero three?
I was at my wit's end, I nearly broke down and cried
It's like my dog, my mom, my best friend and my dreams had all died

He felt as useless as garbage, just like human refuse
He had lost every semblance of joy
He's nearly to the part where he's bit by a goose
In Schaumburg, Illinois

I saw the big golden arches, about a 1/2 mile yonder
I thought I'll buy a hot cup of coffee and reflectively ponder
And so I headed down the sidewalk and I had traveled a piece
And on the left I saw a big pond and big flock of geese

I thought nothing more of it, I thought the geese would ignore me
But out of my left eye I saw these geese coming for me
I started running but it was too late they had already caught me
And on my left thigh just below my butt this big fucker got me

The rest of the story isn't very exciting
I found my friend's apartment but by week's end we were fighting
Over some girl in a bar, to even say it makes me wince
And the next day I was on a bus and I haven't seen my friend since

He's ashamed of himself, there's simply no good excuse
For letting some girl his friendship destroy
But now he's told you the story of being bit by a goose
In Schaumburg, Illinois