Lyrics Honey, Don't You Want A Man Like Me? (Deluxe Bonus Version/Live) - Frank Zappa

Honey, honey, hey
Baby, don't you want a man like me?
Honey, honey, hey
Baby, don't you want a man like me?

He was the Playboy type, he smoked a pipe
His favorite phrase was "outasite"

He had an Irish Setter

It was a singles bar, a Tuesday night
The moon was dim, the band was tight

They did the bump together
What a splendid sight
(Roon-doon-doon-doon)

Her teeth were white
The drinks were cheap, it was ladies night
He was glad that he met her
She was an office girl, hery name was Betty
Her favorite group was Helen Reddy
They discussed the weather

Honey, honey, hey
Baby, don't you want a man like me?
Honey, honey, hey
Baby, don't you want a man like me?
Honey, honey, hey
Baby, don't you want a
Baby, don't you want a
Baby, don't you want a man?

She was a lonely sort, just a little too short
Her jokes were dumb and her favorite sport
Was hockey in the winter (oh, you son of a bitch)
He was duly impressed and was quick to suggest
Any sport with a puck had to be 'bout the best
As he jabbed his elbow in her

Later on they went off to where the music was soft
The candles were drippy, they saw a real hippy
Who delivered their dinner

The rice was brown, and soon they found
That the crowd around that had jammed the room
Well, it seemed to be getting thinner

Honey, honey, hey
Baby, don't you want a man like me?
Honey, honey, hey
Baby, don't you want a man like me?
Honey, honey, hey
Baby, don't you want a
Baby, don't you want a
Baby, don't you want a man?

He took her home to a motor court
She would not kiss him, he tried to ignore it
But it made him angry (angry, it made me so angry
So angry I could have killed that lousy bitch)

He called her a slut
A pig and a whore
A bitch and a cunt
And she slammed the door (the door)
In a petulant frenzy
(A petulant frenzy, this is a petulant frenzy
I'm petulant and I'm having a frenzy, so there)

On the sofa she weeps, boo-hoo-hoo-hoo
She weeps and she weeps, boo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo
She weeps and she peeps through the curtain

He just got in his car but the battery's dead
So he asked to use the phone
And she gives him some head
And that's the end of the story

Honey, honey, hey
Baby don't you want a man like me?
Honey, honey, hey
Baby don't you want a man like me?
Honey, honey, hey
Baby, don't you want a
Baby, don't you want a
Baby, don't you want a man?
Baby, don't you want a man sometimes?